In these times of pandemic, my work has called for helping more people to pass over with peace and dignity.
In our culture, we have stripped dying of meaning, often reducing it to a medical event full of fear and dread. My work helps to reclaim death’s sacred ground and provides practical tools and rituals to help caregivers use the time of dying and grieving as a path to wholeness.
In dying we pass through a narrow gate at the threshold between the known and the unknown. This passage can be travelled with meaning and dignity instead of blindly with fear, pain, and regret.
My most poignant experience of death was losing my paternal Grandmother whom I was very close to. It was a sudden announcement of pancreatic cancer and I was young and had no idea how to cope with the process. I followed the lead of others which involved a mix of pretending it wasn’t happening and inward terror. As a result, I never said the things to my Grandmother that I wanted to, and I never spent the special time in the final weeks that I would have liked to. Years of pain after her passing followed for me, I was not at peace with her leaving and harboured emotions of guilt, sadness, pain and anger. I wasn’t able to feel her close, even though I attempted to cling tightly to the belongings that she left behind.
It wasn’t until I trained in energy work that I was able to perform a ritual that forms part of the Death Rites that drastically changed things for me. I was able to help her spirit pass over. I realised in my grief I had been clinging to her, keeping her spirit stuck and stopping her passing over to the light. I was too afraid to let her go, I had too much I hadn’t said. In performing this ritual and finally letting go, I found I was at peace and I hadn’t lost her at all. In fact, I was able to feel far closer to her and connect on another level where both she and I were free.
I was able to achieve this with energetic ritual years after her passing. So, it is possible to heal and work with these rites in retrospect and achieve the peace that I have, we always have a chance to go back and heal – it is never too late.
NB – This work is not in place of professional medical or psychotherapeutic work.
For more information on End of Life Rites: